ABNORMALIDAD IN THE PHILIPPINES!!!

A friend wants to share this....

50. Where the most happening places are not where the party is. Instead it is where the gang wars happen, where women strip and where the people overthrow a president.

49. Where even doctors, lawyers and engineers are unemployed.

48. Where everyone has his personal ghost story and superstition

47. Where mountains like Makiling and Banahaw are considered holy places.

46. Where everything can be forged.

45. Where school is considered the second home and the mall considered the third.

44. Where Starbucks coffee is more expensive than gas. ..pero malapit na silang pumantay

43. Where every street has a basketball court and every town only has one public school.

42. Where all kinds of animals are edible.

41. Where people speak all kinds of languages, and still call it Tagalog and where it is fast
becoming unfashionable to speak English/Spanish.

40. Where students pay more money than they will earn afterwards.

39. Where call-center employees earn more money than teachers and nurses, where doctors
study to become nurses for employment abroad.

38. Where driving 4 kms can take as much as four hours.

37. Where flyovers bring you from the freeway to the side streets.

36. Where the tourist spots are where Filipinos do not (or cannot) go.

35. Where the personal computer is mainly used for games and Friendster.

34. Where all 13-year-olds are alcoholic.

33. Where colonial mentality is dishonestly denied!

32. Where 4 a.m. is not even considered bedtime yet.

31. Where people can pay to defy the law.

30. Where everything and everyone is spoofed.

29. Where even the poverty-stricken get to wear Ralph Lauren and Tommy Hilfiger (fake)!

28. Where the honking of car horns is a way of life

27. Where being called a bum is never offensive.

26. Where floodwaters take up more than 90 percent of the streets during the rainy season.

25. Where everyone has a relative abroad who keeps them alive.

24. Where crossing the street involves running for your dear life.

23. Where wearing your national colors makes you baduy.

22. Where billiards is a sport, and darts is a bar game.

21. Where even the poverty-stricken have the latest cell phones. (GSM-galing sa magnanakaw)

20. Where insurance does not work.

19. Where water can only be classified as tap and dirty - clean water is for sale (35 pesos per 5-gallon).

18. Where the church governs the people (owwss!!!) and where the government makes the people pray for miracles. (Amen to that!)

17. Where University of the Philippines is where all the weird people go. Ateneo is where all the nerds go. La Salle is where all the Chinese go. College of Saint Benilde is where all the stupid Chinese go, and University of Asia and the Pacific is where all the irrelevantly rich people go.

16. Where fast food is a diet meal.

15. Where traffic signs are merely suggestions, not regulations.

14. Where all the trees in the city are below six feet.

13. Where being held up is normal. It happens to everyone.

12. Where kids dream of becoming pilots, doctors and basketball players.

11. Where rodents are normal house pets.

10. Where the definition of traffic is the "non-movement" of vehicles.

9. Where the fighter planes of the 1940s are used for military engagements, and the new fighter
planes are displayed in museums.

8. Where Nora Aunor is an acclaimed actress and Boy Abunda is the best talk show host, where the population knows more their showbiz stars better than their national heroes and past presidents, knows more of showbiz gossips than their national history and current events.

7. Where cigarettes and alcohol are a necessity, and where the lottery is a commodity.

6. Where soap operas tell the realities of life and where the news provides the drama.

5. Where actors make the rules and where politicians provide the entertainment.

4. Where finding a deer on the road will be a phenomenon.

3. Where people can get away with stealing trillions of pesos, but not for a thousand.

2. Where being an hour late is still considered punctual. (Grabe talaga 'to!)

1. Where the squatters have more to complain (even if they do not pay their tax) ---- than those employed and have their tax automatically deducted from their salaries. and finally......

0. Where everyone wants to leave the country!!

Abnormal Questions that Need no Answers (1)

Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born?
If you undergo chemotherapy do you lose your pubic hairs?
What happens when you put a jedi lightsaber in water?
What do you call male ballerinas?
How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?
Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?
Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are?
What is another word for "thesaurus"?

Credit Where Credit is Due.

Like the New Look? Sure you do!It was creatively done by a dear old friend, Gemma Ocampo Sioson. She is currently designing and selling blog templates. Do visit her site at http://ammegsioson.blogspot.com/.

Meg, thanks uli!!!

Ten Abnormal Birthday Wish!!! (Para dun sa mga bumati –as of July 5- at kahit na dun sa hindi)

1) Sana Matuto na si Maryanne na gumamit ng “Brightness at Contrast” sa Photo Editor. Ngipin lang kasi ang nakikita sa kanyang Profile sa Friendster. (july 5 -nasabi lang pinalitan na) Sana Matuto na si Weng na gumamit ng “sunblock”. Ngipin lang kasi eehh....kayo na magdagdag.

2) Sana ireveal na ni Edna Bayaborda ang kanyang BF…Sana ireveal rin ni Lester ang Kanyang BF …(wag ka na kasing magkaila ….Fafonggay ka eh)

3) Sana naman magkaroon si Jho ng pictorial na nakabikini lang habang nagcacarwash…..

4) Sana naman hulihiin ng MMDA si Jho na nag pictorial na nakabikini habang nagcacarwash…EYE SORE kasi….

5) Sana maramdaman ni Aiy at ni Colette na 3 dekada na rin sila…AT KAILANGAN NA KAILANGAN NG MAGASAWA….wehehehehe (PS. Classmate kayo nung college sa PLM : Si Collete dating si Trinidad at si Aiy si Rizarian…pababago pa kayo ng pangalan eh)

6) Sana magkaroon ng grand EB ang mga taga-JASHS.Com (Calling Major). para hindi lang sa online ko kayo maKUTYA at Ma INSULTO kundi sa personal…..(Gemma, Linuwa pala ng dagat ha…resbak ito pre!)

7) Sana makita na ni Tintin ang tamang tao para sa kanya….sana hindi ito si Racquel (Kayong dalawa, Fafonggay din?)

8) Sana hindi na tahimik si Ann Chung at si Cher…pero I do wish na lumagay na rin sila sa tahimik……………wag lang sa walang hanggang katahimikan.

9) Sana matandaan ko ring batiin sina Muma, Annie at Angie…kasi kakahiya naman binati nila ako…samantala ako deadma lang pag birthday nila.

10) Sana next year….ganun pa din kasaya at ka-abnormal tayo :P

MGA PRANING LIST!!!

Thanks sa support mga baliw!!! Especially tatee, fharen, adora, tintin, gemma, dea, collete (c trini i2), at ella na gumawa pa ng pangugutya (tribute kuno) wehehehe sa akin sa kanyang blog…hanapin nyo na lang dyan sa gilid ang mga blog ng mga ungas ... and do try gemma’s recipe for pinausukang palaka wehehehehe….

PSYCHO TEST 2: Colors

My psychiatrist has once again given me a test on my sanity... The dumbass supplied the answer while I supplied the questions (ano to' jeopardy)

PURPLE- What color is Barney, baklang dinosaur, i love you, you love me?

WHITE - What is the general color of all underwear and intimate apparrel?

GREEN- What is the word that best describe your mind after reading question number 2?

GOLD- What is the color of hepatitis usually associated to DOMs who has penchant for emiratee bling bling?

PINK- Who is the HAS-BEEN, CYNDI LAUPER WANNABE singer who uses the same name as her hair color?

GRAY- Aside from the word OLD, what is the best adjective to describe George Clooney?

BLACK- What is the generally accepted color of blackheads eventhough they really are sirquan gray?

RED- What is the color of regla?

MAGENTA- What is the color of regla after two days?

OLD ROSE- What is the color of regla after a week?

BROWN- What....tekalang hindi na regla yan...tae na yan eh

AQUA- What is the band that shares the name with this color who is quite infamous for their song, i'm a barbie girl from a barbie world? (Shet, tanda ko na)

ORANGE- What is a fruit that is a color that is a fruit that is a color within a fruit?(nahilo ka...)

SKY BLUE- Duhh! kelan ba naging yellow ang sky!!! Duhhh!

HOT PINK- What is the best color that best describe Ms. Tessa Valdes Prieto?

RAINBOW Colors- What is the best color that best describe Tim Yap and Raymund Guittierez?

...dun na lang kami sa rainbow paslide-slide

Psycho Test 1: One Word Answers

My Psychiatrist asked me to reply to the following test just to know kung gaano kalala na ako...I should reply the first thing on my mind...Let us see

1. Beer - nagpapaganda ng mga panget!
2. Food - The thing turns to moss green after digestion...sakin ganun...
ewan ko sa inyo
3. Relationship - di kailangang mag-on...parang talong at bagoong
4. CRUSH - female American Gladiator na maslaki ang muscle kaysa sa boobs.
6. Life - Guard
7. Color - Blind
8. Dream Job –Blow... .... come on....you know I can't let that one pass :p
9. The President – Pandak!
10. Yummy - dating burger house sa may katipunan(?) shet tanda ko na....
11. Summer - ANG INIT!!!!
12. Movie - Malamig ...masarap matulog...zzzzzzzz
13. Halloween - awoooooooo!!!
14. Night – Scorpoio
15. Religion - Zoroastrianism-yung mga taong naglalagay ng mga patay sa bubong para kainin ng ibon
16. Myspace – Friendster pa rin!!!
17. Fear – Nothing to fear but fear itself...my first matinong sagot.
18. Marriage - with free inlaws : (
19. emo - yung katama nina mig mird, mert, mernie, mookie monster etc.
20. SLIPPERS - Spartan!!!
21. SHOES –kahit ano basta walang amoy!
22. Asia - Agcaoili
23. Pizza – New York, New york Yellowcab!!!
24. PBB - Sux
25. Cell Phone - was stolen
26. TV Show – TMZ...Know you know ba't alam ko ang mga latest
28. News – No News is bad marketing!!!
29. COLLEGE – YUPI
30. Highschool Life - everything (almost everything) i did in high school,
I've posted in www.jashs.com
31. Tattoo – cordillera art
32. Stars - tingin ka sa taas...sige na...tingin na......ayan....
wait lang.....SAPAK!!! How many stars do you see...
33. Fitness Center – thighs and tights ;)
34. Friends - yung nagpapautang....uy na guilty!!!
35. LOVE - is a many splendored thing!!!